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  • Writer's pictureLynn B. Lewis

Grief Triggers...Ugh!

Updated: Feb 19

I recently had an unexpected encounter with a wave of grief during a visit to the bank; a trigger. Triggers are those things that sparks memories of a loss. They have a way of showing up uninvited. This one was tied to the memories of my son Daniel who died in August 2019. Oddly enough I've been to that bank countless times prior to that day without incident.

When Daniel was sixteen and had gotten his first job, we went to the bank to open his checking account. It marked a significant moment for both of us - he dipped his toes into adulthood, and I got a glimpse of my child taking steps toward independence.

As I left the bank's parking lot I found myself transported back to that Saturday morning nineteen years ago, passing the very spot where he parked that day. Suddenly, sadness washed over me with tears threatening to spill onto my cheeks. I wished it could be a shared memory, something we could reminisce about together rather than one I had to navigate alone. It's in those moments the question resurfaces: Why, Daniel, why did you have to leave?

Triggers can be unpredictable. Subsequent visits to that bank may or may not stir up the same emotions. And if they do it might be a smile instead of tears. Triggers can be quite the challenge, to say the least.

So tell me in the comments -

Have you had to contend with triggers?

If so, how do you manage them?

Need support? I've got you.

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